Understanding and avoiding the dating trend, Roaching

Jul 05,2022

''Roaching'' is the act of hiding the fact that the person you are dating has other crushes, lovers, matches, or dates. Roaching happens before you decide to be "exclusive" with each other, which means you won't see anyone else but each other.

When confronted, your partner will assert that monogamy was never inferred. Instead of apologizing or saying, "I'll never do that again," they say, "I had no idea we were that serious" or "It's alright to see others." Multiple relationships are not always inappropriate. However, dishonesty can complicate matters (not to mention be disrespectful). The disgusting aspect of roaching is its concealment. A roacher will be secretive about their actions, leaving you feeling like a fool when you realize that you're not the only person they're dating. If you discover during this talk that your partner has been sleeping with other people without your knowledge, you have been roached.

The following are indicators that the person you're dating is seeing others behind your back:

  • They perform random disappearance acts in which they are inaccessible for hours or days and then reappear and act normally.

  • They will cancel plans with lame justification.

  • They are rarely available.

  • They post images of night out’s that you have no idea about.

  • They make no effort to prepare for the future.

  • They will conditionally agree to a date but will not confirm or cancel it until the last minute.

  • They refuse to discuss exclusivity or a romantic relationship.

  • Over-explain or speak rapidly attempting to conceal the facts by creating a smokescreen.

  • They maintain a distance from you.

  • They will not disclose any personal information to you or introduce you to their family members, colleagues, and friends.

  • Sub-consciously delivering verbal or physical hints that they are not being entirely transparent or honest.



How does one best deal with the situation?

  1. Take the moral route: To stop the connection and move on, it is best to be mature and have a dialogue with the individual involved.

  2. Forgive, forget, and move on: No amount of apologies or emotional drama can justify staying in a toxic relationship. This would just leave you with a persistent sense of uneasiness and trust concerns, thereby turning the relationship into a toxic vortex that you may later regret.

  3. Do not overthink and over-focus: Do not attempt to explore the "whys and how’s" of it. It will just make you feel worse, and it will be considerably more challenging to end the connection.

  4. Take measures for mental and emotional stability: Exiting a relationship, particularly after being roached, can be detrimental to one's mental health. Make an appointment with a counsellor, talk to someone you trust, and keep yourself busy.


Reasons Why Society Should Condemn the Dating Trend "Roaching":

Love doesn't hurt. Rejection, playing games, mistreatment, being ignored, complacency, and apathy all hurt. Love feels nice, and when it's right, you know it. "


The following are compelling arguments as to why "roaching" should be condemned by society:

  1. Roaching is dishonest, fosters dishonesty and mistrust, and can result in feelings of insecurity, jealousy, betrayal, resentment, and disdain in dating and relationships.

  2. In addition to being immoral, roaching can be extremely harmful to one's physical and mental health. According to research, people who engage in hook-up culture are more likely to suffer from depression, anxiety, sexually transmitted diseases (which can be passed on to partners), unwanted pregnancies, and other negative consequences. Roaching exacerbates these dangers as it frequently results in additional shattered hearts and feelings of betrayal, isolation, and alienation.

  3. By lying and misrepresenting the truth, those who engage in roaching are typically able to dominate and keep power over their partners. This can make them feel trapped, alone, and helpless, all of which can make them more likely to act abusively.

  4. Not only does roaching cause harm to the individual being lied to, but it also sets a poor example for others. It sends the message to other individuals that deceit and manipulation are acceptable in dating and relationships, which can have a negative effect on society as a whole.